Nosey Rosy

 

     Everyone has or at least should have that one friend that will tell you when you have a stain on your shirt in that area under your boobs that you can't see, that those skinny jeans you thought made your butt look so great gives you camel toe in the front, that you need to pluck those 2 random chin hairs.....AND when you have a rogue nose hair permanently sticking out of your left nostril.  -Don't you all be sitting there going "eww gross chin and nostril hair" you know you have had a stray or 2 of your own and the further past 30 you get the more appear.  You aren't fooling anyone pretending you haven't.

     Chesty McBreasty is that friend for me.  Unfortunately life has been pretty busy for both of us lately and we haven't spent nearly enough time together lately -much to the relief of Papa Bear and Manuel the Mexican Gardener (whom is neither Mexican nor a gardener).  Thankfully the youth soccer association of Stinkburg has allowed us to reunite for an hour and a half (would be 2 hours but Chesty time runs about half hour behind) weekly by putting 2 of our kids on the same team (her to play the game and mine to pretend).

    I think it only took about 5 minutes of Chesty sitting next to me in our traditional Soccer Mom issue folding camp chairs for her to turn to me and make me aware of a Nosey Rosy the Rogue Nose Hair's presence.  While I pulled at it and rubbed at it trying to brush it away and then tried to shove it back inside the nostril, Chesty made the conclusion that Rosy was indeed attached and not going anywhere.  She was later removed with a pair of tweezers in front of my bathroom mirror while Wee One looked on asking a million questions about what I was doing.

     So, with that taken care of I just have to ask those that see me on a regular basis, "WTF?  I'm so sure you have been letting me walk around with hair sticking out of my nose for who knows how long!"  That sucker was long so I know ol' Nosey Rosy has been with me for a while.  I'm not entirely sure how I missed her myself other than the fact I don't do a lot of time in front of the mirror with my glasses on which I suppose I should start to do but these people see my face a million times more than I do.  Are they having a conversation with me and staring at Rosy hanging there waving at them?  Did they assume the first time they noticed her that she wasn't attached and then the next time they saw me that I had another unattached hair hanging from the same nostril and then again?

    I suppose some would claim they are too polite to say anything.  I think it is more polite to let someone know about something like that than let them go through their day to day business with an unknown friend saying hello to everyone they talk to face to face in a day!  I'm not asking you to broadcast the issue or point and shout or anything like that but "Hey Stace, you've got something a little freaky going on there" next time would be good.  I would do it for you -you know I would.  Thanks in advance folks.

Send This To 5 Friends

Everyday I get a dozen or so emails. A bunch of them are just junk. Advertisements and "you have a chance to win a free vacation" notices. A few are jokes and quick messages from friends...and then there is the inevitable chain letter.

You know what I'm talking about. The emails that go on and on about something or other and then at the bottom they say something like "send this to 5 friends in the next 5 minutes or you will have 5 years of bad luck". Some say something fantastic will happen if you pass them on and some say something bad will happen.

According to the one I got a couple of weeks ago I should be dead by now and I should have the worst luck ever, and a leprechaun isn't going to visit me and grant my wishes and I will be ugly, and poor, and I won't know my true friends. I'm pretty sure I'm still OK. I don't think by not passing on an email chain letter I am playing Russian roulette with my life/luck.

Who starts these letters? Who actually sits down and writes this crap and then sends it to their friends expecting them to pass it on. I usually only pass these on to the people that flood my inbox with them. Ha ha sucker, you pass it on or deal with the bad luck.

*IF YOU DON'T EMAIL THIS BLOG ENTRY TO 5 FRIENDS IN 5 MINUTES YOU WILL BE CURSED WITH 5 YEARS OF BAD LUCK*