Thursday, July 9, 2009

In My Red High Heels

For the longest time I never understood how or why women wore high heeled shoes. Part of this ignorance towards heels might have been to my inability to walk in them. OK, I was able to walk but it wasn't pretty.

Then one day I walked into a store and saw the most adorable pair of red polka dot heels and I had to have them. I put them on and instantly felt the pull of the muscles in the back of my legs. I felt my sex appeal go up a couple of points. I felt taller and more powerful. I felt more feminine than any other piece of clothing or accessory had ever made me feel before. I felt like shouting "I am woman, hear me roar!".

I bought them with intentions to first learn how to walk in them and then to wear them to my future brother in laws wedding. I also bought a pair of flats...just in case.

For the next couple of weeks I wore my super cute heels around the house. I wore them while I did laundry and while I did dishes (well while I loaded the dishwasher anyway). I wore them while chasing my 3 little monkeys around the house in my pajamas. I planned an outfit to wear to the wedding that would match the heels as well as the flats...just in case.

Determined to wear these fabulous shoes to the upcoming event I decided I needed to make sure I didn't look like a heffelump walking in them. I asked Papa Bear but really I needed a women's opinion. Crazy Mamas to the rescue! Just one of the millions of times it comes in handy to have 9 great friends willing and able to help with just about anything at any given time.

I went to "The Young, Blonde Wannabe"'s house first and strutted across her hardwood. Looks good she told me. OK...but I wanted to be REALLY sure...just in case. Next I went to "Chesty McBreasty"'s (she is probably the closest I know to a high heel expert) and paraded around her living room. With her approval I was finally convinced that I was ready to make my public high heel debut.

I continued to practise for the last few days before the wedding and then the day of I slipped on my spectacular red footwear, felt the "power surge" and cautiously headed out.

At the end of the night I had several blisters (mostly due to the extremely rainy wet weather) and a new sense of accomplishment. That's one small step for any women, one giant (sexified) leap for Slightlyinsanestacey.


Chesty McBreasty said...

Love it! They are super cute I can't wait till u find an outfit to match your bright pink ones!!

slightlyinsanestacey said...

I FREAKING love that you commented under the name Chesty McBreasty! lol

SweetyPi said...

Great post again Stacey. I think you have given hope to the female mass to feel the "power surge". I read your description of your Crazy Mama's and since I've only really met them once, I can imagine who you're referring to. Good job.

slightlyinsanestacey said...

It shouldn't be too hard to figure out who that name belongs too lol

Chesty McBreasty said...

I'm only gonna comment under that name from now on.
That's just fabulous that there are people out there that know me only by the nickname you've given me! :P If some random person on the street starts calling me that I'm not gonna be impressed!!

slightlyinsanestacey said...

Whatever you love it